Do Women Cheat as Much as Men? What Research Actually Shows
Sometimes this question comes from curiosity. More often, in my experience, it comes from somewhere more painful.
Maybe you've just found out your partner cheated, and you're trying to understand how common this is. Maybe you're a woman who cheated and you feel like the only one. Or maybe you're simply wondering whether the old idea that "men cheat, women don't" is still true.
So let's look at what the research actually says about whether women cheat as much as men. And then, gently, at what the numbers can't tell you, which is usually the part that matters most.
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The Short Answer
Overall, men have historically reported extramarital sex more often than women, but the difference varies considerably by age and has narrowed among prime-age adults.
A recent analysis of General Social Survey data from 2021 and 2022 found no statistically significant difference among ever-married adults aged 25 to 54. In that group, 11 percent of men and 14 percent of women reported having had sex outside their marriage.
So, do women cheat as much as men? There isn’t one simple answer. It depends on the population being studied, the time period, and what researchers mean by “cheating.”
What the Research Shows
The Gap Depends on Age
Earlier analyses of the General Social Survey found a clearer gender gap in older age groups, while younger adults showed much smaller differences. More recent analysis of GSS data from 2021 and 2022, however, found no statistically significant difference among ever-married adults aged 25 to 54: 11 percent of men and 14 percent of women reported infidelity.
So age does matter, but the relationship between age and infidelity is more complicated than simply saying that men cheat more as they get older.
The Numbers Have Changed Over Time
Infidelity rates have not stayed constant over time, and the gender gap has changed with them.
An analysis of General Social Survey data found that among ever-married adults aged 25 to 54, the share reporting extramarital sex declined from 17 percent in 1991-1998 to 14 percent in 2010-2018 and 13 percent in 2021-2022. The decline was more pronounced among men, while the rate among women remained relatively steady. As a result, the difference between men and women has narrowed considerably in recent data.
There are also older studies showing relatively small differences between men and women. For example, a 2011 study of 918 people in heterosexual monogamous relationships found that 23.2 percent of men and 19.2 percent of women reported sexual infidelity during their current relationship.
These studies don’t give us one timeless percentage. They show why the year, sample, age group and definition of infidelity matter when interpreting the numbers.
The Reasons Often Differ
Research also suggests that there isn’t one simple explanation for why people are unfaithful.
A 2024 pre-registered study of 254 people from 19 countries examined motivations for infidelity and found a range of motives rather than one explanation that applied neatly to women or men. The researchers concluded that looking for a single gender-based explanation for infidelity is likely too simple.
In my own counselling work, I also see women describe affairs in terms of disconnection, unmet needs, loneliness, resentment, or things they had stopped saying within the relationship. Those experiences can help us understand an individual situation, but they don’t mean every woman who cheats is responding to the same thing.
I've written about these patterns in more depth in the 7 real reasons women have affairs.
Why the Numbers Can Mislead
Before you hold on too tightly to any statistic, it helps to know its limits.
People don't always tell the truth about cheating, even anonymously. All of these figures come from what people are willing to report. The real numbers could be higher for both men and women.
Many studies only count sexual infidelity. The General Social Survey, for instance, asks about sex outside marriage. It doesn’t capture every form of infidelity, including many emotional affairs. That matters because different studies define and measure infidelity differently. If the definition changes, the numbers can change too.
Definitions vary. One study may count a secret emotional connection as cheating; another may not. That's one reason different surveys give different numbers.
Most research comes from the United States and Europe. Patterns in Singapore and across Asia may differ, and there is very little local research on who cheats.
So the numbers can give you a rough sense of the landscape. They can't tell you what's true in any one relationship.
Is Cheating Common in Singapore?
This is a question I'm often asked, and the honest answer is that no one really knows. Singapore doesn't have a large survey on infidelity like the ones above, and there is no local data comparing how often men and women cheat.
The closest official figures come from divorce records, but they need to be interpreted carefully because they record the legal grounds or stated reasons for divorce, not the actual prevalence of infidelity in marriages.
In Singapore's latest marriage and divorce statistics, adultery was cited in just 0.9 percent of civil divorces in 2025, the least common reason of all. Almost half, 48.7 percent, cited "unreasonable behaviour" instead (Singapore Department of Statistics, 2025).
That doesn't mean affairs are rare here. Family lawyers have pointed out that these figures reflect how the legal system records and proves grounds for divorce, rather than providing a direct measure of how common affairs are.
Adultery is harder to prove in court, and "unreasonable behaviour" is a much broader category that can include an affair along with many other things. Among Muslim divorces, where the reasons are recorded differently, infidelity was the second most common main issue, at 18.4 percent.
So in Singapore, as elsewhere, the numbers only show a small part of the picture. What I can say from my own work is this: infidelity is something many couples here quietly carry, often without telling anyone, partly because it can feel so private and so hard to talk about. If that's you, you're far from alone.
What the Numbers Can't Tell You
Here's the part I most want you to hear.
When someone searches for infidelity statistics after being hurt, they're rarely just looking for information. They're often looking for relief. Is this normal? Is it me? Will it happen again?
A statistic can't answer those questions. Knowing that 13 percent of women have cheated doesn't tell you why your partner did, or whether she will again. And if you're the one who cheated, knowing it's more common than you thought doesn't make it okay, or tell you how to repair it.
What actually helps is looking at your own relationship, not the average one.
What to Ask Instead of "How Common Is This?"
If you've found yourself reading statistic after statistic, you might pause and try these questions instead. They're more likely to give you something you can use.
If you were cheated on:
What was happening between us in the months before this?
Is she taking responsibility, or explaining it away?
Has anything actually changed, or only the behaviour on the surface?
If you're the one who cheated:
What was I looking for that I wasn't finding, or wasn't asking for?
When did I first start keeping things to myself?
What would need to change, in me and between us, for this not to happen again?
If you're simply wondering about your own relationship:
Do we both feel heard?
Are there things we've stopped saying because it's easier?
These questions don't have quick answers. But unlike a statistic, they point you towards something you can actually work on. If you're trying to understand whether it could happen again, will my partner cheat again? looks at what research and patterns suggest.
If you're struggling to process what happened, infidelity counselling in Singapore can give you a private space to understand it, work through the hurt, and decide what you want next.
Frequently Asked Questions
Do women cheat as much as men?
There isn’t one universal answer. Historically, men have often reported extramarital sex at higher rates than women, but the difference varies by age and has narrowed considerably. In a recent analysis of General Social Survey data from 2021-2022, 11 percent of ever-married men aged 25 to 54 and 14 percent of women reported infidelity, a difference that was not statistically significant.
Who cheats more, men or women?
It depends on the population and the definition of infidelity being studied. Men have historically reported extramarital sex more often in many surveys, but recent U.S. data show no statistically significant gender difference among ever-married adults aged 25 to 54.
Is cheating common in Singapore?
There's no large local survey on infidelity, so no one knows exactly. Official divorce records show adultery cited in under 1 percent of civil divorces, but lawyers say that reflects divorce law, not how often affairs happen. Many affairs fall under "unreasonable behaviour" instead.
Why do women cheat?
Research points to multiple possible motivations for infidelity, including relationship dissatisfaction, sexual dissatisfaction, personal factors and attraction to an alternative partner. In counselling, some women also describe feeling emotionally disconnected, unheard or unsupported, but there is no single reason why women cheat. For a deeper look, read why women cheat, and why it's rarely about the other person.
Are emotional affairs included in cheating statistics?
Often not. Many large surveys focus specifically on sexual behaviour, so they may not capture emotional affairs or other forms of relationship boundary crossing. Because researchers use different definitions of infidelity, the figures can vary substantially between studies.
Does knowing the statistics help after being cheated on?
It can help you feel less alone. But it can't tell you why your partner cheated or what happens next. For that, looking honestly at your own relationship, ideally with support, is far more useful.
The Numbers Are a Starting Point, Not an Answer
Do women cheat as much as men? The research doesn’t give us one universal answer. Men have historically reported extramarital sex more often in many U.S. surveys, but the difference varies by age and has narrowed considerably in more recent data. A recent analysis of the General Social Survey found no statistically significant gender difference among ever-married adults aged 25 to 54.
The bigger lesson is that statistics can tell us something about populations, but they can’t explain an individual relationship.
That part comes from looking at what was happening between the two of you, and within yourself. And that's something you don't have to do alone.
If you're struggling with trust, communication, or what happens next, relationship counselling in Singapore can give you and your partner a space to work through these conversations with support.
If you'd like a calm, private space to understand what happened, on your own or together, you're welcome to book a 10 minute complimentary call.
Not ready to book yet? Send me a message on WhatsApp.
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